Friday, February 10, 2006

On Magpies, Crows and Politics

Glenn Roeder - was he DUPed into entering politics?

Jeffrey Donaldson- managing the Magpies?

One topic I tend to avoid like the plague on this site is Northern Irish politics. It's a tedious, futile subject and one which I find difficult to take seriously. A party political system based on primitive tribalism rather than genuine ideology is little more than an amusing spectator sport when viewed from the outside. I occasionally comment on the subject on other blogs, but usually with tongue firmly in cheek. Such discussions often result in online sectarian bitch fights, with one side childishly slagging off the other with little regard for civilised rational debate, so we often have ugly scenes akin to the online version of a Tyrone v Dublin Gaelic football match. Fellow blogger Twenty Major hits the nail on the head in his take on the Northern Ireland political situation:

"I'm not really one for political blogs, I have to say. I don't care too much about politics, North or South of the border, and I don't care if we ever get a united Ireland. Frankly the arguments between people who want a united Ireland and those who don't are like those between a Manchester United fan and Liverpool fan. Both believe that their team is the best but no matter how eloquent or well-written or well-presented their argument the other bloke is always going to think their point of view is that of a c**t. It's a no-win situation."

Twenty Major is a cynical, foul-mouthed character, but his blog is dangerously funny and his analysis of the Northern Ireland situation is probably more accurate than the works of most academics and journalists over the last 50 years.

Anyway, getting to the point. It seems that the Democratic Unionist MP Jeffrey Donaldson has added another string to his bow by branching out into football management. Following Newcastle's sacking of Graeme Souness after a string of dismal results, apparently Jeffrey has now been appointed caretaker manager. Jeffrey's clean-cut image and Donegal Mammy's boy crooner looks along with his no-nonsense attitude would seem to make him the ideal man for the job, but how well he goes down with the Toon Army supporters remains to be seen. Meanwhile it appears that former assistant coach at Newcastle, Glenn Roeder has become the MP for Lagan Valley. Daniel O'Donnell was unavailable for comment.

Daniel O'Donnell: unavailable for comment

As I've already broken one unwritten rule today I might as well break another! For the benefit of any concerned netizens out there who may be lamenting declining moral standards in the blogosphere I will put your minds at rest by stressing that the Dreaming Armadillo will NOT be dumbing down to the level of a cheap gossip column on the private lives of celebrities. However as a cycling fan I just couldn't resist comenting on this story! It seems that one of America's less talked about celebrity couples Lance Armstrong and Cheryl Crow have decided to call it a day by breaking off their engagement.

Armstrong and Crow: they think it's all over.

I'm not sure what brought this about, but I have a feeling it could be something to do with politics. Armstrong is an unashamed Republican (in the American, not the Irish sense - although Gerry and Martin would probably welcome him to the fold given half a chance) and on pretty good terms with his fellow Texan George W. Bush. Crow, on the other hand is an out and out Democrat, having campaigned for the party during the last presidential election along with a host of other trendy celebrities, including fellow musicians REM. So is the split down to irreconcilable differences? Who knows, but as the old expression goes, a Crow in the hand is worth two in the Bush.

George W. Bush: unavailable for comment


Charles the Chimp said...

On behalf of the chimpanzee community I wish to complain about being caricatured as the American president. Such insensitivity is beyond my comprehension. I demand a full apology as soon as possible.

CW said...

Charles, please accept my profound apologies for denigrating your species by likening you to George W. Bush. We all know you're a lot more intelligent than that.

Rationalist said...

I also heard that Cheryl Crow had campaigned for Kerry. She wasn't very successful though - I heard they got soundly beaten by Tyrone.

The Man said...

I thought Daniel O'Donnell was the MP for Lagan Valley.