Friday, October 27, 2006

I’m in the money………………..supposedly!

Apparently I’ve just won some money without even having entered any competition or draw. Some guy calling himself Donald Van Oliver (possibly a gestalt life form who goes around stealing the molecules of celebrities and mixing their DNA – in this case Donald Duck, Van Morrison and Oliver Reed/Jamie Oliver?) has kindly notified me by e-mail that I’m eligible to receive €1,500,000.00 from the Dutch international lottery. They have a very clever way of picking the winner. I quote:

“The online cyberlotto draws was (sic)conducted from an exclusive list of 25,000 e-mail addresses of individual and corporate bodies picked by an advanced automated random computer search from the internet. No tickets were sold. After this automated computer ballot, your e-mail address emerged as one of two winners in the category.”

It seems like I’ve been very lucky over the last few months as I’m getting a lot of these prize-winning notifications. But, I’m in a generous mood and would rather donate my winnings to charity. Unless anyone out there would like to collect the cash on my behalf and donate it to a worthy cause of their choice?

Here’s the details:

Ref Number: PC 607 ES 208
Batch Number: 26371545-LNI/2006
Ticket Number: PCP 002 871

Just send an e-mai to clmoffc@aol.com, citing the above reference and I’m sure the cheque will be in the post within a few days. If not, then just keep bombarding him with e-mails and the odd virus and I’m sure you’ll eventually get your money.

15 comments:

Parnell said...

Ciaran: we,ve both hit the money pot, Donald Van Oliver is giving away money by the bucket load. An there's me thinking I hadn't a pot to piss in, but now I'm loaded.

Apart from the cars, luxury houses foreign holidays and designer everything else the money won't change me a bit. Though the family, friends and colleagues will have to go - can't have them poor people ruining my new image.

Lorainne said...

I am upset!! Why has Donald not offered me any money. I will write to him to complain.

CW said...

Don Van's obviously a generous man, Lorainne, so just drop him a line!

Antonio from Italy said...

Ciaran,
if you want a name for donating your money to charity I can give you mine ;-)

CW said...

Yes, Antonio - the An Cat Dubh Benevolent Fund I suppose? You could use the money to relocate to Ireland.

Antonio from Italy said...

Yes, Ciaran, moving up there is one of my dreams ;-)

Barry Beef said...

Hello Ciaran. It appears that either you or Parnell is lying because I was the other winner.
Congratulations. Loads-a-money

CW said...

It must be a lucky time for me Barry as I've also won the same amount this week again in the Dutch lottery that I didn't enter. To quote from the e-mail:

"We are pleased to inform you of the announcement today Nov 3nd, (sic) 2006, you among TWO LUCKY WINNERS WON the GOVERNMENTAL AWARD draw held on Nov 1th, (sic) 2006. The THREE Winning Addresses were randomly selected from a batch of 10,000,000 international email addresses."

The other "randomly selected" winner must have been either yourself or Parnell, so one of us must be lying.

By the way I notice that like myself you're a Sheffield Wednesday supporter. It's good to know that there's more than one of us in the blogosphere!

Parnell said...

AHA, Sheifield Wednesday supporters are excluded. Donald Van Oliver said so himself when I posted the last cheque, to cover insurance - postage and package amd administration costs naturally. So it's mine. All mine on my, own -e -oh.

Barry Beef said...

Up the Owls. 4 home wins on the trot

Anonymous said...

This is a scam, like the Nigerian email scam. Don't waste your time or money on it by divulging ANY FINANCIAL INFO or by paying any fees to get the money. A sucker is born every minute, so don't be a sucker. Any one that tells you that this is legit is in on the scam.

Anonymous said...

Hey look, I just won one of the two prizes too! How many 'two prizes' can there be?

From: quadcruiselottery@universia.edu.ve
Subject: PRIZE AWARDS WINNING NOTIFICATION
Date: November 23, 2006 8:44:31 AM CST

FROM: GOVERNMENT ACCREDITED LICENSED LOTTERY PROMOTERS.
WINNING NOTICE FOR CATEGORY \"A\" WINNER

Dear Lucky Winner,

RE: LOTTO INTERNATIONAL NL PROMOTION PRIZE AWARDS WINNING NOTIFICATION

We are pleased to inform you of the result of the just concluded annual
final draws of Lotto International Netherlands programs. The online
cyberlotto draws was conducted from an exclusive list of 25,000 e-mail
addresses of individual and corporate bodies picked by an advanced
automated random computer search from the internet. No tickets were
sold.After this automated computer ballot, your e-mail address emerged
as one of
two winners in the category \"A\" with the following:

Ref Number: PC 607 ES 208
Batch Number: 26371545-LNI/2006
Ticket Number: PCP 002 871

You as well as the other winner are therefore to receive a cash prize
of EUR 1, 500,000.00.each from the total payout. Your prize award has
been insured with your e-mail address and will be transferred to you
upon meeting our requirements,statutory obligations, verifications,
validations and satisfactory report.To begin the claims processing of
your prize winnings you are advised to contact our licensed and
accredited
claims agent for category \"A\"winners with the information below:

Mr. Donald Van Oliver
Department Director,
Netherlands Lottery International Nl Company
[Lotto International Netherlands], 107 Vanderloop
1902AB ,Amsterdam, The Netherlands

E-mail:clmoffc@aol.com
phone:+31 616 735 356

NOTE: All winnings must be claimed not later than 20 days. After this
date all unclaimed funds would be included in the next stake.

Yours faithfully,
Mrs. Agatha DeBoer,
Games/Lottery Coordinator.
Lotto International Netherlands

Anonymous said...

Thanks, Donald! I'm using my winnings to fund the transfer of millions of dollars for a Nigerian widow. Next up: I'm buying a present for Walt Disney Jr (obscure reference to the Walt Disney Jr. scam).

CW said...

Dutch lottery administrators and widows of Nigerian politicans killed in tragic accidents must be the most generous people on earth if they're willing to give all that money away to so many people.

Anonymous said...

HEY PEOPLE PLEASE HELP ME!!

IS THIS TRUE?

I'VE RECEIVED THAT MAIL AND I WANT TO KNOW IF I CAN REALLY MAKE SOME MONEY!!

PLEASE GUIDE ME!

DUKE