Tunes that ring a bell

Don't you just hate it when you phone a call centre or technical helpdesk and get that recorded message that gives you all those irritating options:

Press 1 for if you would like to receive Chinese water torture
Press 2 for electric shock treatment
Press 3 for the answer to the meaning of life
Press 4 to be put on hold

I pressed 3, but they put me on hold anyway. At this point you usually get some classical aria like Handel's Water Music or Vivaldi's Four Seasons to entertain you while you wait. But on this occasion it was Mike Oldfield's "Tubular Bells".

I suppose it's the sort of easy-on-the-ears repetitive jangle that you can listen to for the duration of your wait, without much chance of it going through your head for the rest of the day - unlike certain Ultravox songs.

With the highly overrated "Tubular Bells" it's effectively the same tune for the entire album with Oldfield the ultimate king of musical pretentiousness single-handedly playing every instrument. He's a fine musician and composer though. I personally think that "Moonlight Shadow" and "To France" are two of the greatest songs ever written, but he does have a tendency to take himself too seriously. He must be a multi-millionaire tax exile with a luxury yacht moored somewhere off the Swiss coast, but does anyone know what he actually looks like? I wouldn't recognise him if I saw him in the street. He could ring my doorbell and pass himself off as a dodgy second-hand car salesman and I wouldn't know any better.

Another bestselling musician who basks in such anonymity is Enya, who refuses to go on tour, but at least people know what she looks like. I'm reminded here of an article in one of the Sunday papers a few years ago on Pink Floyd's "Dark Side of the Moon". I do like the Floyd, but I think DSOTM isn't quite as good as it's made out to be. Personally, I prefer the more psychedelic Syd Barrett stuff - "Piper at the Gates of Dawn" et al. Anyway, this article pointed out the anomaly the DSOTM is one of the biggest selling albums of all time, yet the members of Pink Floyd could walk down the street and not be recognised. They could easily be mistaken for estate agents.

This in turns reminds me of the time last summer when on board a train between Harrogate and Leeds I spotted a bloke who bore an uncanny resemblance to Dave Gilmour. Then the very next day it was announced that Pink Floyd would be reforming for the Live8 concert. Spooky or what? I'm pretty sure that if I'd ventured into the next carriage there would have been a Roger Waters lookalike sitting there.

What's even weirder is that I was in the pub last night and shortly after last orders "Tubular Bells" got played. A mildly interesting coincidence perhaps? But, wait for it and brace yourself. Can you guess what song came after this? Yes, straight up, this is 100% true. Fucking "Vienna".